Usually I give it up for free. Now I feel used and I haven’t even held the check in my hand, just a contract promising me $250. (I hear that’s good money for what I just did.)
Yeah, that’s right. I sold a piece of myself…A piece of writing.
I thought it would feel better, but now I’m preoccupied with the shame of it: It wasn’t that good. People are probably judging me right now! Also I’m stuck in a kind of literary psychosis wondering what it means that Narrative magazine published my istory as part of Narrative Backstage, which is like pay-per-view. Was the piece not quite good enough for the free online version? (What kind of a question is that?)
Aw, hell. What am I doing? I should be grateful anyone’s willing to pay money for my writing. And I AM. Really.
It’s just that once money is exchanged for something…I don’t know…that something feels sorta cheapened. I don’t understand this feeling, but I’m making a real effort to focus on the good parts. Namely that my face appears in a line up next to other REAL writers in a literary magazine that I LOVE.
So thank you, universe (and Narrative people). I hope you enjoy the tiny peek at my private stuff.
You deserve the money for your work! Congratulations!
Thanks, Ross. I really need to learn to be more gracious. Maybe I should go to a class on that…
…a “class” class? har har.
Congratulations Meagan! Hell yeah you deserve it and cheap but not easy… right? Way to go!
Thanks, Dawn. By the way, I envy all the travelling you’ve been doing. How’s your writing? You sound WAY busy. I don’t know how you even blog as much as you do. You’re awesome.
Thanks! I feel very lucky to have done all this traveling recently and the current series of blog entries have been pretty well received, as I highlight our trip to Peru. I have been lagging on the blog though, short of my usual 3 entries a week. The trip was so amazing and meant so much to me, it’s hard to sit down and put words to page. It may take awhile to write about the whole 2+ week trek and Amazon adventure! Stay tuned… Again, Mazel Tov on the Narrative piece!
Oh, and hey, doesn’t the fact that we have to pay to read this, make your writing that more “exclusive!” Just the opposite my dear… you scored a step up from the free stuff me thinks. Sweeeet.
You’re too kind, my friend. Way. Too. Kind.
I’ve been unable to do much of anything productive this summer and after finding out about this publishing thingy. It’s about time I pull up my big girl pants and get on with life.
You make me laugh. Out loud. I hear you. I find myself very unmotivated since our return from Peru and spend an awful lot of time doing, almost nothing. I think you deserve to crow a bit and enjoy this success. You are very talented, and it’s fun to see your writing out there. Keep it up big girl!
Congrats! I sort of know what you mean about the embarrassment/awkwardness/God versus mammon anxiety, but I say let it go–this is awesome news!
love
Ela
Thank you, Ela! I can’t wait to see you next week. Hope you’re doing well. Thanks for the comment and the encouragement.
Meagan
Congratulations, I will have to plunk down the $4 some time soon!
Thanks! There’s actually a ton of great stuff in Narrative Backstage. Consider “donating” to Narrative and accessing ALL of it 🙂
Glad you stopped by!
Meagan
I have to tell you “cousin”- the opening teaser is a great grabber. super Congrats for getting some real world sustenance ( aka CASH) for doing what you obviously do very well!
When it comes to your writing, there is never ‘Nuff said. :-0
Thanks, cuz. The payment finally came in yesterday. Felt like it took forever, and I was starting to sweat a bit, thinking I’d mistaken it for junk mail and accidentally thrown it away. whew. I made a copy of the check, which I will be putting on my office wall. Because I’m a nerd. I’ve been a bit blog-absent this summer, but I’m gonna change my ways and will stop by and visit you 🙂
Oh Don’t delay — do it today! lol You will see why I called you “cousin” I even have just bragged about you here http://aircooledunderware.wordpress.com/2012/09/01/would-you-prefer-hot-pink-underwear/
AWESOME! Thanks so much Nuff Said! I’m thrilled that you gave me a brag! I’m heading out right now (into the real world), but would love to brag back at you. I’ll have to think of something creative…